September 14, 2008

Cats: Succulent and Luscious

I had just pulled several all nighters, and was finally flying home. On my flight, a kindly old lady sat next to me. We chatted pleasantly before the plane took off, and afterwards I hinted that I wished to get some sleep.

The nice old lady must have not gotten my message.

“Do you like cats?” She asked me, pulling out a photo album.

“Why yes, I love cats,” I replied politely.

Delighted, she began to point out her favorite pictures of her cats.

“Wow,” I exclaimed. “My mother would love that cat,” I pointed.

“Really, you think so?” She replied, eyes wide with happiness.

“Yes, she’s always mentioned how hard it is to find a coat of that color,” I replied, innocently. “The cats I usually deal with don’t have such a nice sheen to their fur, since it supposedly subtracts from the taste,” I continued gamely.

Her mouth widened in shock.

“Oh, dear God,” she muttered.

I nodded, and assumed that her dismay was at the injustice of cats not being able to provide both a delicate taste as well as a lush coat.

“Most of the time, people just throw away the body of such a beautiful cat after they take its coat.” I tapped the photo, shook my head sadly and sighed. “So wasteful,” I stated.

“I, on the other hand, believe that a beautiful animal must be succulent as well no matter what the ‘experts’ say. It’s all about the preparation. You can’t prepare a dish from a beautiful animal the same way you prepare a dish from a common food cat. It requires proper seasoning and extra caution,” I told her.

“Truth be told though, sometimes I’ve found that a little hot sauce brings out the taste perfectly,” I confided in her and winked.

The kind woman’s face steadily changed from apprehension to dismay to pure horror. She stiffened.

“I believe I’ll read my book now if it’s all right with you,” she murmured weakly and turned away.

I let a look of dismay cross my face. I had hoped to exchange recipes with her.

I woke up at the end of my flight feeling refreshed and content. I got off the plane with a smile and was happy to be home.



    I was curious on who had left a comment and I come to cat eating people. Interesting.

    I own a cat, but I joke about that stuff all the time. I'm surprised she got so stiff about it, obviously she doesn't have much of a sense of humor.

    I probably would've giggled the whole ride home if someone told me that.

    That old lady must be traumitized though.

  2. I mentioned this post of yours in my post today in, Conversation Over! I hope you don't mind.